As a recovering perfectionist, sometimes it's still difficult for me to admit that I just can't get everything done that needs to be done. Proof positive that each of us is a lovely "work in progress" when it comes to our habits and mindsets.
For weeks I've felt rather "guilty" about not posting here. It's not wise or fruitful to host a blog and not write anything! But there's only so much you can do.
When I am teaching online (as in our current Winter Sadhana), traveling around the state teaching in-person (like here), or crafting inspirational/supportive resources (like these), I find that my creative energy is limited. No surprise there! How much can one person create or write in a given day?
But the perfectionist part of me still gets loud and snarky, peskily reminding me that because I am a capable and smart woman, I "should" be able to do it all.
Fortunately, there is a wiser part of me who knows that it's alright to say "I don't think so," or "Enough for one day." She is the voice of self-compassion who recognizes that the old stories and habits die hard. She reminds me that I am a human BE-ing and not a human DO-ing.
She encourages me to do what I can do and to let go of the rest. She invites me to stop and take little breaks during my work day. (Yes, I do put in a real 40-hour work week. I am disciplined that way, having been self-employed for 30 years.) She invites me to end my day early when I need to, or take a power nap, or simply sit and gaze out the window at the beautiful landscape when my mind feels muddled.
The voice of self-compassion always invites me to do "The Kindest Thing" for myself.
So, in the last few weeks, the kindest thing for me was not to blog, and to know that is was alright not to.
This voice of self-compassion invites me to stay self-aware, enough that I can take good care of myself on all levels, including saying "No" to some things and "Yes" to others. There is no tried and true path for knowing what is the kindest thing to do in any given moment. It varies with each of us and we need to honor that. Your "Yes, I can do that," might be my "No way," and that's alright.
As much as I love being in touch, ultimately, when it comes to this blog, I'll post when I will and I won't when I don't feel it's the kindest thing for me. I'll keep listening to the voice of self-compassion and trust its wisdom.
I wish the same for you. May you remember that there is only so much you can do and that the rest will just have to wait for another day. You and your well-being are the most important thing.
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